Friday, April 5, 2013

FOX News is So Dumb It's Missed the Greatest Conspiracy Theory of All, The US is Ruled by Borgs


Not the Borg You're Looking For?
Yeah this one seems to have been created by a computer running a formula supplied by the person who placed the image on Flickr.  I used it because the person who placed in on Flickr and I assume who created it offered it's use by Creative Commons License Attribution for anyone to use.  Thanks to Tanaka Juuyoh.

But back to Borgs running the US.

This all hinges on the theory of Borg inter-connectivity.  And Star Trek Voyager.

Specifically Seven of Nine, the beautiful Jeri Ryan.

Ms Ryan was once married to a Former Goldman Sacks broker and, at the time, a teacher in a Private Franciscan school, Jack Ryan, who decided he wanted to run for Senate from Illinois. Unfortunately, he'd been divorced by his gorgeous wife and Star Trek Voyager's Seven of Nine a few years back and news media sources wanted a look at the custody files surrounding the divorce.  Mrs. Ryan didn't want them opened either according to reports.  But a court ordered them revealed and there were allegations of Mr. Ryan asking Mrs. Ryan to have public sex with him in clubs in New York, New Orleans, and France.

That basically did it for future senate hopes for Ryan and he dropped out of the race, after which the GOP brought in Alan Keyes (who had last run for Senate in Maryland).  (And that has implications for Scott Brown who has suggested he might have carpetbagging tendencies himself, and is considering running against New Hampshire's Jeanne Shaheen next year -- no better way to say, I'm in it for the money and power, folks.)

But in FOX News world this is a perfect conspiracy, a Borg is responsible for getting Obama in power, and they all work together right?

Except for the fact that Borg are a well known part of popular fiction it all works  (better than Bill O'Reilly's claim that the sun goes up and the sun goes down and nobody knows why that happens and later that "The tide goes in and the tide goes out and no one knows why."  When told the gravity of the moon pulls on the oceans, he then claimed victory saying "But why do we have a moon?  Mars doesn't have a moon!"  Unfortunately for him Mars has two moons.)

I guess they just have to work with facts people don't know or they think no one knows because they never had science classes.

Except for all that it's obvious that Obama owes the Borg and they are secretly running the government.

I guess the new FOX plan should be to privatize education so kids learn less and  grow up into adults who can be fooled more, which is something they actually do push for.